


ghosts.

by trucefully



Category: Buzzfeed Unsolved (Web Series)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Fluff, Ghosts, M/M, Paranormal, Paranormal Investigators, Songfic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-21
Updated: 2019-09-21
Packaged: 2020-10-25 14:48:15
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,271
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20725970
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/trucefully/pseuds/trucefully
Summary: "This little church draws out desires that hide inside you." She whispered to my sleeping form with all the tender care of a mother lulling her child to sleep. "Make the right choice."[Short oneshot, AU]





	ghosts.

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading my first time delving into writing these two idiots. Hopefully not the last time. Follow me on Tumblr if you still use it, truce-fully.
> 
> Song: Ghosts by Nicole Dollanganger

Choices were never my strong point. Self-doubt and anxiety would plague my mind, even if the decision were something as simple as what to wear for the day. I would second-guess my tentative decisions until it was more like a seventh or eighth torturous revisit to such a meaningless thing. Like trying on clothes and spinning endlessly in the dressing room mirror. Did I like the fit? Was the style something I could work into my current wardrobe? Was the price fair? Did I really need it? All things people would mentally go over once, but I would beat that dead horse until it was just a stain on the ground. Or until I was asked to leave the dressing room because I was taking a suspicious amount of time.

Shane thought it was hilarious whenever I was obviously stressed by trivial things. “Stop thinking so hard,” He would tell me with that stupid smile, “It’s not the end of the world.”

At times, it honestly felt like it was. Those times seemed to be whenever he was around me. Everything was more pressing, and I just wanted to do it all right. Whenever I fell short, he was there to laugh. He did usually try to help me correct it. He liked to stand back and watch me fight through my anxiety, probably wondering what the hell was wrong with me. 

Unfortunately, most of my time was spent around him, and under that same pressure. It was no different on a chilly night in the middle of nowhere Alabama, standing in front of the silent husk of a little Presbyterian church. The only thing different on that clear, deep autumn night was that I didn’t second guess for three distinct times.

Coatopa was the last place on earth I thought I would be, and not because it was just a stain on the map of the south. I proposed an investigation of this tiny church after receiving an email from one of the locals swearing on her life that it was haunted. The ghost that she said was trapped there was that of her mother, who spent hot summer nights being unfaithful to her father in the abandoned building. When her dirty little secret was exposed, she took her own life, leaving her family in confusion and grief. 

The story drew me to beg Shane to travel out here with me for a number of reasons. One was that this church had no local draw of being “haunted” like many of the other places we visited, mostly just tourist attractions. Second, this woman was willing to expose a very tragic event in her family’s lives because she truly did believe that her mother’s spirit resided there. Lastly, the background she gave me. 

We stood on the barren ground before the church, staring up the old white walls to the empty bell tower that lit up with the setting sun. I clutched my camera in one hand, and a flashlight in the other. Shane had both hands in the pocket of his jeans and looked bored. “It’s puny.” He said with a frown, glancing at me. “Don’t we usually try to do like… Bigger things?”

“I feel like this could really have an attached spirit.” I said firmly, walking up to the cracked concrete steps. The closer I got, the more eerie it felt. I got spooked easily, sure, but there was really something here bringing a heavy feeling down on my heart. “The lady in her email said that her mom went nuts before she died-”

“She was crazy with guilt.” My partner dismissed. He was staring at the church with a constant unpleasant frown. 

I shook my head. “No, she was talking about the spirits that floated around this church.  _ This church _ ! Why would she give away the location that she was being unfaithful at? She kept saying they put awful thoughts into her mind. She went from sanity to just… Paranoid.”

Shane rolled his eyes, but didn’t make any further arguments on that subject. “I don’t see why we’re here. There’s no history to this place except this one woman’s claim. We’re not going to see anything. Not that we ever do.”

I bit back the remark I wanted to make every time he bitched about ghosts not being real.  _ Why are you here, then? _ He certainly didn’t have to volunteer to come with me on every trip. He didn’t get anything out of this except an excuse to travel and days on end holed up in dirty old buildings with me. Shane literally got nothing out of it except seeing me scared. Maybe he liked it in a weird way. 

We walked up the steps side by side, even though they were barely wide enough for one person. One of the double doors was cracked open, and an unsettling lack of noise was our only greeting. My hands shook a bit as I peered inside, clicking on my flashlight and shining it in like a beacon that could ward away bad things. 

Four rooms, two on each side interlocked along the hallway that stretched back into the chapel. There was no furniture, and only a bit of scattered trash. I swallowed hard, taking the first step inside so that Shane wouldn’t taunt me for being a baby. 

“There’s even more nothing in here than I thought there would be.” Shane complained loudly. I wanted to shush him, but I wasn’t even sure why. It felt like we were interrupting something, or someone. I glared at him out of the corner of my eye, and he shut his fat mouth just as he was about to taunt the structure some more. 

We searched the doorless rooms, finding nothing more than discarded homework and a broken desk chair. I still scoured each space thoroughly, because I really didn’t want to go into the chapel. It felt oddly alive, like it was slowly drawing us in for sinister purposes. When there was absolutely nothing left to see, not even broken glass to pick up, I forced myself to walk into the chapel. 

Shane grinned, watching me edge into the large room by myself. “Seriously, Ryan. What are you afraid of?”

“You don’t feel that?” I asked, perfectly aware he didn’t. He gave me an exasperated sigh as a response. “I know someone is here.”

“ _ Someone _ .” Shane echoed with a scoff. 

I had to just ignore him. He couldn’t tap into anything beyond himself, which was both good and bad. Good he wouldn’t be under the same stress that I was, and bad because it made me look properly insane. Despite that, I knew what I was feeling was real. Like a metal weight was placed inside my heart. My feet shuffled across the debre-coated floor to the raised platform at the top of the chapel. Probably where the pulpit used to be, or a choir or something. There were no more pews, no chairs. Just the hollow body of the holy house, abandoned by man and unseen by god. It was starting to get overgrown on the outside with weeds. It would rot and return to the earth.

Shane wandered into the chapel with me, squinting against the sunset that seeped in through the cracks in the boards that covered the windows illuminated me from behind. “Are you gonna preach or something?”

I shrugged, switching on my camera. “Hear ye, hear ye. This place is tiny and stupid, and probably haunted.” The screen on the old camcorder turned on just in time to capture Shane grinning. For once, he didn’t taunt me for bringing up ghosts again. He sat cross-legged in front of me on the floor, waiting for me to continue. “I don’t like the way it makes me feel. The woman in the email said her mom would talk about how there were eyes always on her. And I can feel that here.”

“Maybe you’re being possessed. You’re next, Ry.”

“Not funny.”

Hopping off the stage, I nudged Shane with my foot as I walked back towards the entrance. “Let’s set up camp for the night before it gets dark.”

We spent the last of the chilly daylight bringing in supplies from where we parked his beat up old Jeep on the muddy lawn. Not just ghost hunting stuff, but bedding and a cooler of food. We were going to spend the night in the chapel, like a couple of dumbasses. I set up a camcorder on top of the platform, where Shane was spreading out a sleeping mat for his bed. He stared at the camera and shook his head slowly. “You could at least like… Not point it right at me. If the police break in and see this set up…”

“Whatever you do on camera, I’ll delete later.” I chuckled. I switched it to night mode, and the screen showed the room in tones of green. Shane’s pale hand flipped me off through the lense. 

With our small shelter set up for the night, I started to get into the mindset to hunt for spirits. It was definitely something you had to switch on and off just so you weren’t too vulnerable to the invisible forces. Shane didn’t believe in any of it, but I did. I swore more than once I had seen him physically affected by a spirit. But he would honestly rather die than ever admit to it. 

Shane watched me pace back and forth, then checked his watch. “We should probably get to talking to the air if we want to be asleep anytime soon.” He rummaged in our bag of hunting gear and handed me the EVP recorder. 

I took a deep breath, nodding and taking the small device.

“Let’s do this.”

-

Four straight hours of speaking to the air, just as Shane had predicted. He humored me while we investigated, asking questions that may have bordered on sarcastic. Frustratingly, there wasn’t even an odd creak or a shuffle of wind, let alone a disembodied voice. The presence that I had felt earlier seemed to have vanished when I opened up my mind and started to actually seek it out. My partner could tell I was getting discouraged after a while. He even let me break out the spirit box, but it hissed static and nothing more. Not a single intelligible word. We were alone.

I didn’t even want to finish the investigation by walking around outside. I tossed the EVP recorder on my sleeping bag on the dusty floor and avoided looking at Shane. “That’s a wrap, I guess.”

As much as Shane loved to taunt me for my beliefs, he didn’t even crack a smile now. “You sure? I wore my hiking boots. I’ll protect you out in the forest if you’re scared.”

“No, you’re right. This place doesn’t have anything. I probably just hyped it up.” I plopped down onto the edge of the platform and put my elbows on my knees, and my face in my hands. “I was just so sure… I’m sorry.”

Shane shuffled his feet, then came and sat by me. He set down his camera and shut off his flashlight, and we were plunged into darkness. I could see straight back to the double doors that hung open, letting the chilly air inside. More than hating Shane being right, I hated myself for dragging him all the way out here. Other places he at least got the satisfaction of telling me I was an idiot when I got genuine evidence of spirits. Here, we were just stuck in a dirty old building for the rest of the night. Nothing to do but sleep and make the long trip back home to LA tomorrow.

“Maybe the ghosts are sleeping.” Shane tried.

I shook my head slowly.”They’re in eternal unrest. They can’t sleep.” We were quiet for only about two seconds before we started to laugh. I covered my face, and Shane leaned back on his hands. “Where would they even sleep, Shane?”

He shrugged. “Maybe they float around in little ghost hammocks. Or fly up to the clouds and sleep there. I don’t know. Just seems tiring to be wandering around for the rest of eternity, don’t you think?”

“What makes you think they can feel stuff like that?”

“What makes you think they  _ can’t _ ? Ghosts aren’t real, so therefore they’re capable of anything in this fictional scenario-”

Before he could finish, the building came creaking to life. I heard an odd cracking noise, and suddenly light flooded the room. Before I could really process what was happening, Shane had his arms around me and jerked me away from where I was sitting. 

_ Crash. _

I closed my eyes tightly and waited for the pain I anticipated with such a loud noise. But none came. I just felt encased in two arms, and the fabric of his sleeve clutched in my hand.

“Jesus Christ.” Shane exclaimed, his hold on me loosening only just slightly. I peeked over my shoulder. Where I had been sitting, a large parcel wood board was cracked over the edge of the stage. Both our eyes followed the trail of dust that danced in the pale outside light up to the now-gaping window it had come from. 

We were silent for a while, just holding on to each other. 

“Shane, that board was nailed to the frame.” I whispered.

“Don’t. Don’t say it, don’t you dare.” Shane warned. “I swear to god if you even  _ breathe _ the word-”

“It  _ had _ to be-”

“Ryan!”

His sharp tone threw me off. I looked up at him, surprised to find him looking visibly shaken. I did shut up. He was scared.

He avoided my eyes after a second, holding me against his chest and letting out a sigh. “The woman should have warned you that this damn place was falling apart. You could have been hurt.”

“Uh-huh.” Was all I could get out.

I let him hold me for as long as he needed until he was sure I was in one piece. When he finally did release me from his arms, he glared at the board as if it was personally responsible for the close call. “Guess we’ll have to steer clear from the windows.” he said, quickly sweeping the whole incident under the rug as he always did. I was too flustered by his showing of affection to chide him, or even crack a joke. We both moved the board in silence, placing it on the floor away from where I had my sleeping bag set up. Once again, this little chapel was coming to life with unseen energy. Now, I could feel the buzz from inside me. I didn’t say anything about the feeling to Shane, just made sure all the cameras were rolling. 

“If you market that as paranormal proof, I am going to strangle you.” Shane said, winding down from his fear and easing back into skepticism. 

“I think we’ll get more evidence than just a board being pried off a window and flung across the room.”

He groaned. “Clickbait.”

We each sat on our sleeping bags, Shane on the platform and me on the ground beneath him. The odd feeling I had started with began to grow. I was conscious, but felt miles away from my own mind. The buzz was going straight through to my bones, and I just wanted to lay down. Shane was looking out the now-open window to the moon, the pale light glowing on his skin. 

_ I wanted to lay next to him. _

The absurdity of the thought shook me enough to bring me back to my own mind, making me physically shake my head to clear it away. What the hell? I stared at my legs, feeling the pull of yearning begging my body to take me to rest next to him. I couldn't get it out of my head, falling asleep beside him with our arms draped around each other… The desire for him was so overwhelmingly strong, I nearly started to cry.

“Shane...”

He looked over at me, blinking and trying to seem more awake than he was. “What?”

How would I even ask him? I stared for a long time, watching his expression change from passive to curious, and finally to something resolute. I could barely breathe. 

“We should probably sleep.” 

“Yeah, probably should.”

It took everything last scrap of willpower I had to shuffle into my sleeping bag without another word. I lay on my side with my back to him so I could try to force all these rushing feelings away from me.  _ It’s just because we’re alone in a spooky place _ , I told myself,  _ I’m just scared and cold.  _

Honestly, I had been more frightened in other locations. But I wanted to tell myself anything to dispel the pining that was making my chest ache. I tried thinking of all the times he pissed me off. That stupid grin when he teased me, or his annoying matter-of-fact tone he used when he would lecture me on science and “facts”. It worked for about half a second, and then was overcome with a warm feeling from looking back on our memories together. I grabbed a pillow and folded it around my head with a sigh, now attempting to clear my mind of everything and go the hell to sleep.

“You feeling alright?” Shane asked carefully. I could hear him roll over to look at me. “You’re acting kinda weird. Well, weirder than normal anyway.”

I squeezed my eyes shut tight, holding in all the desires that swayed on the tip of my tongue and hit against my sealed lips like waves. I was so scared they will spill out everything that I was working to keep away from the surface. But he was waiting for an answer, and that stubborn dickhead wouldn’t let it be. The less I said, the more he would press. He cared too much, in his own annoying way.

“Just getting a weird feeling from this place.” I finally managed to mumble, rolling onto my back and staring at the arched ceiling. 

Shane didn’t launch into taunting me. Out of the corner of my eye, I could see him nod his understanding. He opened his mouth, a little intake of air starting to form a sentence, then it died in his mouth. I looked over at him. “What?” I asked.

He stared a moment, then gave me a little smile. “Nothing, probably wouldn’t make you feel better. Just try to sleep, yeah? We’ll be out of here before you know it.”

So much was being left unsaid, and I was beginning to realize it wasn’t just me. The realization of that made my stomach twist up with nerves, and my heart pound. Somewhere between something terrifying and wonderful. As always the fear took over, and I pulled my covers up and closed my eyes. The room was buzzing for sure. This time with the electric energy between the two of us. 

-

_ A mother snuck out at night all alone. The moon was heavy in the sky over the endless plains of yellow grass, and she wasn’t afraid of anything. Her feet were bare, and she only wore a thin silk slip over her body. She did this on many nights, and she didn’t see an end in sight. Beyond all the grass and trees, in a little chapel tucked away and shunned, her lover was waiting. _

_ Not the man who put a ring on her finger. Her husband was a good man with a good heart, but he couldn’t satisfy the beast of lust that grew within her every day. It wasn’t just sleeping around with the bartender that fulfilled her. It wasn’t even the thrill of hiding and casting each other meaningful looks when they encountered each other in public. It was something about being in that chapel in the dead of night that filled her head with wicked things. Things she normally would not have done, if she hadn’t followed that charming smile out into their hiding spot in the first place.  _

_ She drifted over the threshold of the church like a gentle wind. Something was different about it now. It felt more alive than it normally did. When she came to the chapel, she understood why.  _

_ We were laying there fast asleep.  _

_ Watching myself through her eyes, still clutching to my pillow restlessly and shifting around. Somewhere in the back of my--her?--mind, I knew this was off. She crouched beside me, trying to touch my arm, but her fingers went straight through me.  _

_ “Everything you want is within your grasp.” She whispered to my sleeping form with all the tender care of a mother lulling her child to sleep. “But be careful, dear. You have to make the right choice.” _

-

The dream dissipated rapidly, and I sat up with the feeling of icy fingers still on my skin. I was shaking all over, and my breath came in hard and fast. Even with reality slowly coming back into my mind, I couldn’t quite believe that was  _ just _ a dream. I could still feel myself watching from inside her being. The grass, the moon, and the draw this goddamn building had were still perfectly vivid in my mind.

My panicked start had been enough to shake Shane out of his sleep. He pushed himself up on one elbow and rubbed his face. “What the hell, dude?” He slurred sleepily, feeling around for the lantern that rested on the ground between us. “What happened? Did another fucking window attack you?”

“Bad dream.” I said quickly. We both awkwardly reached for the lamp, pulled back, then reached again. I gave up and stood to try and get myself to calm down. “Sorry I woke you. Go back to sleep. I’m just gonna… Pace.”

Shane sighed. He also gave up on the lamp. “It’s fine. Don’t apologize. Look, why don’t you just move your bag up next to me? I was gonna suggest it before, but I..” He shrugged it off. “Dunno. Didn’t wanna make you upset or anything.”

“Upset? Why would I be upset? I’m upset now because this place is so fuckin’ creepy.”

“Okay, see? You’re upset. Just shut up and come here.”

I wanted to be prideful and deny his offer. But I was just plain shooken up, and I didn’t hesitate a second more to pull my sleeping bag up onto the platform. Shane shuffled around to make room without knocking the camera over, barely looking at me the whole time. It was so dim, and I was thankful for that. He couldn’t see the blood that rushed to my cheeks as I settled in beside him, or the way my cold hands were trembling. 

Once we were settled facing each other, Shane checked his watch. “About two hours to sunrise. Nearly there.”

I wanted to just slide over and into his arms. We were so close already, I could see the moonlight glinting in his eyes. 

_ You have to make the right choice. _

Was this what she had been trying to warn me about? The choices were pretty simple. I could kiss him, or I could not. It had the potential ruin everything we had built together thus far; the dumb investigations we did and posted on the internet, the easiness we had around each other that I never came across with anyone before, and the years of friendship we had trailing along behind us. All for satisfying the surging feelings inside of me that were trying to throw me at his lips. 

Or, I could back out and never know the outcome. Let things continue as they were. Which wasn’t bad. I loved spending time with him, breaking away from our desk jobs in the city and chasing the unknown together. Would that change if I leaned forward and pressed my lips against his?

Before I even came close to a decision, Shane was the one to move forward. He closed his eyes and rested his forehead against mine. Not a kiss like I had been firing myself up for. Just being close to me. All my senses were alight with an amazing sense of nervousness. 

“You’re thinking too much.” He mumbled. His warm breath breezed over my cheeks. “Go to sleep.”

There was no way I could sleep now, and I didn’t think he could either. I didn’t tell him this. I just closed my eyes and listened to him breathing, sharing in the warmth between us that fought the chill from the night. His breathing was light, as was mine. As the two hours passed, we didn’t do anything aside from waiting for the sun to rise.

-

The rotting husk of a church loomed safely in the distance in the shadow of the rising sun. Despite claiming that nothing was wrong with the place, Shane sure packed up fast while I managed to dose for a few minutes. He woke me with a gentle shake, and we left in a weary silence. Even though we were out, I could still feel the eyes that waited in the chapel watching us from the window. I could feel her. I was happy to leave and never come back. 

We only drove up the road a little ways before pulling over and catching the breath we didn’t realize we lost. My hair was a mess, and the bags under my eyes were like suitcases. But I felt free, in a way. While Shane poured coffee from a thermos, I sat on the hood of the Jeep and clicked through the stills taken by our motion sensor camera from the night. The cries of crows echoed around from the field, mixed in with little autumn birds that pecked about in the frosty fields for breakfast. 

“Did we catch anything groundbreaking?” Shane asked, handing me a tin mug with coffee. It was made just the way I liked it, two sugars and two creams. Shane knew that. 

I tilted the camera so he could see the frame of me pacing and him watching me in the darkness. “Nothing moving except us in there.” I shrugged. “God, that chapel really got to me though.”

Shane snickered. “To be fair, every place we investigate gets to you. You get worked up if our flashlights hit a window wrong.”

I shot him a glare, and he laughed at me. “You’re such an asshole. You know that? I don’t know why I bring you with me.”

“I have no idea why you do, either. Because it’s just us sleeping in old places. You know, the money we’ve spent traveling could probably book us at a really nice hotel for a whole year. Dinners included. And, y’know, a real bed.”

I shook my head and watched him take a drink of his coffee. “But we wouldn’t have a chance of seeing any ghosts that way.”

Shane winked at me over the rim of his mug. “Oh, you got me there.”

The morning was brisk, but I still looked away hurriedly when I felt the heat rising into my cheeks. I cleared my throat and started clicking through the still again. “You won’t be so smug  _ when _ we catch something. Maybe then you’ll stop bitching about the old ass places we have to go.”

Shane chuckled, walking around the side of the Jeep to the trunk. He rummaged in the cooler, calling up to me, “Let’s say that on the very  _ slight chance _ you happen to prove the existence of ghosts, why would we keep hunting? It would all be over then, and we would return to our day jobs. And the world would be in turmoil. We would just be watching it burn comfortably from our own little apartments.” 

“...I hadn’t thought of that, I guess.”

“We’ve been hunting for like, years now, and you haven’t thought about what would happen after?” He quipped.

It really hadn’t even crossed my mind. I was all about the hunt and reviewing evidence. Everything I found had so far been waved away as inconclusive by Shane. If I got what I was looking for, we wouldn’t have to hunt anymore. That would be it; No more sleeping beside each other on dirty floors, no more heckling and banters, no more escaping from the world and being alone (or so to speak) with him.

I was clicking mindlessly now, a little more focused on the sinking feeling in my gut. On the screen, a change to the normal green and black of the night vision made me stop. I had to blink a couple times to make sure that I was seeing the screen correctly.

That evidence was right in my hands. The white figure of a woman was looming over our huddled bodies in one of the stills. It was after Shane had moved in close, and neither of us dared to move and disturb the moment. But right fucking behind us was that damn woman who had lead me through a dream. Clear as day.

_ You have to make the right choice. _ Her voice was still in my head. Fuck, no way. This is what she had been talking about?

Shane was coming back around the side of the van. “Hey, I found peaches!” He said cheerfully. “Who the hell packs peaches on a road trip? I hope they aren’t bruised.”

I deleted the photo.

I could hardly believe it, but I deleted the fucking photo of a ghost. An actual ghost, real life proof. And I deleted it because…

The Jeep rocked a bit as Shane leaned against it with a sigh. He looked over at me, holding the peaches in one hand and opening his knife with a flick of the other. “Find anything haunting,  _ Boo _ -gara?”

...Because of this dumbass.

I smiled, scooting over closer to him, so my crossed legs rested against his back. “Not a thing.”

“I’m shocked.”

He cut my peach into two halves and handed it to me, then did the same to his own. I watched him lick the juice from the blade, a warm feeling spreading from my chest and down my limbs. We ate quietly for a while, trying to fight off the sleepiness and get ready to make the long trip back to the nearest hotel where we could properly crash on the flimsy mattresses and sleep. 

“It’s not so bad.” Shane broke the silence, his voice more subdued than usual. “Traveling around with you, I mean. We aren’t going to find any ghosts of course. It’s just… Not so bad. Just so you know. I would rather be camping out in abandoned buildings with you than… Really, anything else.”

I blinked, more shocked about how flustered he was than seeing a real life ghost on camera. He was looking at his feet, and his cheeks were splashed with red. I noticed a little drop of peach juice on the edge of his mouth and wiped it away with my thumb. “Yeah, it’s not so bad being stuck with you.” I replied, smiling at him when he glanced my way shyly. “You’re not the worst.”

“You either.”

He didn’t pull away when I put my arms around his shoulders and rested my cheek against the back of his head. I made the right choice, and wherever that woman was, I hope she knew. I didn’t hesitate to delete that photo and continue on. Above everything else, even the fucking afterlife, I chose Shane. 


End file.
